My grandfather died quite a while ago
The memories I have with him make me sad
But I was just a young boy you know
When he died it made me really mad
He was a good grandfather to me
Moe always took me fishing
His boat was named the M.I.B.
And we always stopped to go swimming
We always came back with the fish we caught
And lay them all out on a rock
He’d use the fillet knife that he bought
We leave them to rot on the dock
Moe was a really good man
He always cared for my brothers and I
But when he kicked the can
A piece of everyone else had to die
3 comments:
really really well done
obvoiusly a lot of care and heart put into this
just a few things
do the memories u have with him make you said or does knowing there will be no more make you said
did they rot on the dock?
change kick the can it just doesnt fit with this poem
it is a slang word for dying and i dont think that is how you represent your feelings in this poem
well done
i cant believe that u actually made all that rhyme. Alot of heart in this. You have some air words that you can get rid of though instead of The memories I have with him make me sad
But I was just a young boy you know
you could do
memories I have with him make me sad I was just a young boy you know
you could also talk about the u dont want to forget the memories or want to but it might mess up the rhyming
this is definetly the best poem out of everything
i would say it has a lot of incentive and i can feel
your feeing
also....
I also see you have a lot of air words that a NOT needed. so if you take out thoughs air words and trust your reader this poem could be amazing
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